2012

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Go Find Yourself

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It took 1300 miles, 18 hours, 4 redbulls, a hopeful heart, and a few pages of tattered computer paper to get me down to the state of Tennessee. Was I crazy? Sure. But sometimes life takes a turn towards the shocking.

I was always one to play by the rules. In high school I studied for exams instead of chugging beers in the parking lot. On Friday nights I would find myself surrounded by my scrapbook, pasting photographs onto designer paper. Sure, I had a boyfriend but he didn't seem too enthralled by my "lame behavior"...

I later found out that he cheated on me. I guess a non-drinking-scrap-booking queen wasn't a turn on...

Even though I wasn't ashamed to admit that I was quite crafty, I started to loosen up on the "whole-play-it safe" side of my personality in college. Within four years, I acquired a taste for Jack Daniels, learned how to apply eyeliner, and learned how to dress more like a woman. Although I had come a long way, I still found myself engulfed in a sea of doubt. I couldn't help but think that the persona I exhibited to the world was exactly that- a persona. It was the mask I showed to the rest of the world the minute good ol' Jack gave me a little extra strength to be a little less CAREFUL.

I was predictable.

Boring.

Fearful of being rejected.

It took a journey to change my perspective; a forgiving stretch of highway.

In truth, my friends questioned my decision. After all, who drops everything they have ever known (a steady job, best-friends, the place you have always called home? In truth, I was tired of being the so-called hamster spinning ferociously on the wheel, eager to move on, but getting NO WHERE. Calling deuces, I sold my furniture, packed my bags, and met my destiny one state line at a time.

Little by little I found myself growing. I started to walk with an air of confidence and even started believing in the power of my dreams. I found myself reaching for the fruit on the limb; the goals I once deemed impossible. After all I had found the courage to do what others thought I could never do.

In my own little way, I had taken the first step in finding myself.

And the rewards? They keep me smiling, eager to tackle the next obstacle that comes my way.

Live, Dream, Love

The Girl Who Keeps Dreaming

She Believed

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Failure is inevitable.

The past two months have been difficult to say the least.

And although I wouldn't like to admit it, I have almost given up on the notion of becoming a published writer. 

Is there a point in trying when you are told "It's not what I am looking for?" How much rejection can one take?

For a dream? 

Well, rejection is the fuel that keeps the fire burning.

Without the naysayers and nonbelievers there would be no hope. No real reason to prove them wrong. 

Sure, there are the lucky few; the anomalies in the sea of prospering talent who by CHANCE get discovered.

But for the rest of us "normal" people, it takes time, dedication and hard work. 

I saw this photograph on Pinterest and immediately felt inspired. My belief, although slim, heightened with rendering possibility. If I believed, could I make it happen?  

We will have to see...

In the mean time, I'd like to know your dreams, the secret goals that keep you curious...

Feel free to share, to comment, to give advice to those who may seize to believe....

She believed she could, so she DID.